2012: Year of Casey

Lately, the odds have been ever in my favor (anyone else kinda excited to see the Hunger Games...?).  The weather is amazing, I'm not stressed over my bills too much and I'm just in an overall good mood almost all the time.  I'm sure those three things are all interrelated, but I also think that my optimistic attitude derives from the fact that I've finally made my peace with the fact that the next chapter in my life is about to begin.  

I used to think of the year 2012 as the end all, be all of years.  When I would think of the "future," it ended at 2012.  My brain could simply not imagine what would ever come after that fateful year.  But now that it's here, I gotta say: I love 2012.  I've decided that 2012 is going to be my year and so far, it's living up to my expectations.  And since I'm a huge dork, every time something awesome happens, no matter how big or small, I think to myself:  2012... Year of Casey.

(I know it's relatively annoying and douchey sounding when people refer to themselves in the third person, but I think it actually sounds less narcissistic than "Year of Me."  But that's not the point...)

There's a number of reasons why I think I always imagined 2012 as such a final year and none of them have to do with this whole end of the world thing.  However, they all have to do with the fact that this year, I'm about to cross over to the point of no return.  In other words...

I'm fucking graduating.

Now, for the longest time, this was literally my biggest fear being realized.  I had no idea where the last four years of my life had gone and it scared the bloody hell out of me.  I spent all of last semester worrying about the meaning of life, how my existence would ever be considered important and why no one had really explained that this was the scariest realization I'd ever come to.  But after five months of bi-weekly breakdowns, I decided enough was enough.  Perhaps not-so-coincidentally, this day coincided with New Year's Eve.  Maybe it was all that talk about resolutions and change and bullshit but right there and then I decided I was done stressing, done being unhappy and most of all done caring soooooo much.  10...9...8... As the countdown started, I thought this is it.   7...6...5... 2011, the year of stress, worrying and unhappiness is over.  4...3...2... It's time to get excited for what comes next...1!

2012 had hit and my first reaction was, hey, this isn't so bad!

So, I've decided I'm no longer afraid to graduate, I'm fucking pumped about it.  The real world out there is petrifying but it's also pretty fucking cool.  For the first time in my life I can move wherever I want and do (to an extent) whatever I want.  Staying up all night writing papers that are total bullshit only to find out that it's actually wednesday and your paper is due on Friday?  No thanks.  Begging to get into a party that's going to charge me $5.00 to drink my own weight in Natty Light only to regurgitate it in a toilet that hasn't been cleaned since 2005?  Eh, I'm good.  

The truth is, after 4 years of working hard and partying hard, I'm fucking exhausted.  I'm ready to stop reminiscing about how awesome the last four years of my life have been and start thinking about how awesome the next four years of my life are going to be.  

So, to my fellow seniors, I say...

Let's fucking do this thing.